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Step Up Step Down

Posted on March 14, 2011March 24, 2011 by GESS

“It’s 8:10, and at 8:20 we’ll stop.” That’s what she said. But the bitch is still counting to eights and then starting over. And if she exhorts us to “Give it your all!” one more time, I’m gonna leap up from this mat and strangle her little anorexic, perky-breasted, spandex-and-thong wearing ass.

Wait, what was that? Did the music just change? Yes! Cool down! Thank God. Yes, thank you Jesus. You just saved her life and my soul with one quick change of the CD track.

Who the hell makes these music mixes for the aerobics instructors anyway? Seriously, Kool and the Gang? I mean, Jesus! After 30 minutes of getting up and down this damn step, this fake shit does NOT motivate me.

I guess it works on some people though. That woman in the blue shorts was singing along like her life depended on it. I guess she really does want to “celebrate good times, come on!” Good for her.

As for me, I am just ready for this torture session to end. Priscilla and I have a date at Amy’s Ice Cream in 15 minutes. Damn it. I won’t have time to clean up. Oh well; we’ll just sit outside.

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